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Here's some REAL DIX!! I think you
deserved this beating
That hurt
I hope this hurt
Nothing to say here
If he didn't clip the rail, he
would've nailed the picnic table
Is this guy gay?
I want to laugh, but.....
Not so much a dik, just dumb
I hope someday this guy gets his..
I'll bet she broke up with him after this
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Being a stay at home dad, I found this funny.
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There was an older man that was married to a
much younger woman, and he was having trouble
lasting long enough in bed. So he went to the
doctor and was told he should please himself
before having sex and he would last longer.
One day as 5 o'clock rolls around, he gets a
call from his wife who says she's very horny. On
his way home, he remembers what the doctor said
and decides to jerk it before he gets home. He
thinks,
"Well, I can't do it in the car, but if I get
under it I can pretend I'm fixing my car."
So he gets under the car, closes his eyes, and
starts jerkin it. A few minutes later, there's a
tug at his pants leg. In order to keep the image
of his beautiful wife, he doesn't open his eyes,
but just hollers,
"Yeah?"
"I'm Officer Brown. What are you doing down
there?"
"Well, officer, I'm checking my axle; I think
it's come lose."
"Well, mister, while you're down there, you
might want to check your brakes; your car's 2
blocks down the road crashed into a tree." |
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Monday, two boys were in court after
doing their community service for
vandalism charges, and the judge said to
the first one, "How did you do over the
weekend?"
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people
to give up drugs forever."
"17 people? That's wonderful. What did
you tell them?"
"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew
two circles and told them this (the big
circle) is your brain before drugs and
this (small circle) is your brain after
drugs."
"That's admirable," said the judge. "And
you, how did you do?" (to the 2nd boy)
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 156
people to give up drugs forever."
"156 people! That's amazing! How did you
manage to do that!"
"Well, I used a similar approach. (draws
two circles) I said (pointing to small
circle) this is your butt hole before
prison..... and (pointing to the large
circle) this is your butt hole after
prison. |
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